Why guys act distant all of a sudden? So, here’s how it usually goes: you’re seeing a guy, everything’s going great, but all of a sudden there is a shift, and he’s just backing away. He’s acting a little colder and more distant. And you have no idea what’s going on. He’s still there and around, but there has been a definite shift in his behavior. He just doesn’t seem as excited by you and invested in the relationship. His behavior might be a little bit cold sullen moody. It’s a gut-twisting feeling. You desperately just want to get the relationship back on track. And you don’t know-how from one week to the next things went from being so great and perfect and all of a sudden. He’s just acting weird, and you have no idea what is the cause of this?
First, take a deep breath: panicking, obsessing, and stressing over it isn’t going to get you anywhere. If anything you push him further away then, you’re driving yourself crazy. Don’t let your fears run the show. It’s just not helpful to you and doesn’t serve you. It’s not bringing you closer to a solution to what you need to do. And this doesn’t just apply in this situation, rather this applies to all relationship issues in general. It’s the difference between responding versus reacting when you react.
You are just a slave to your emotions, and it can’t be trusted emotions are like waves. They get high in intensity, and then they come crashing down. You can’t just ride the wave of your emotions because that’s what gets and leads you to lose your temper, cool, and say things that you might not necessarily mean. It’s so much better to take a step back and choose the way you want to deal with this. Instead of just reflexively reacting, which can just cause more problems than it solves.
The Biggest Reasons Why Guys Act Distant:
He’s Stressed About Something:
When men are stressed or emotionally off-balance. They prefer to retreat and work it out internally. You’ve probably heard this before because this is a pretty widespread understanding of men. But it’s important to hear because a lot of women have a really hard time accepting this. Because your process is usually the opposite when a woman’s upset. You want to call your mom, friends and talk to your boyfriend about it. And it makes you feel better to talk to those who were closest to that just in and of itself, makes you feel more resolved with whatever’s going on. Men are not like this, they don’t want to be seen as weak or vulnerable especially, not by a woman that he cares about. He wants to be seen as manly and strong with you.
So that’s why he would prefer to just work things out on his own. So he can come back into the relationship feeling strong and better than ever.
A common mistake a lot of women do that they always assume we’re the problem if something goes wrong in the relationship. They take full responsibility for it and think that it’s on them to fix it. So a guy suddenly acts distant and you assume;
“I must have done something wrong, I must have done something to turn him off, how can I fix it? what can I do?”
You overcompensate and try to be the sweetest most amazing girlfriend when you were never the problem, to begin with. So, don’t assume all responsibility for the relationship on your shoulders because this most likely has nothing to do with you. But what’s the problem with the issue? It could be several things: he could be stressed at work, or maybe he screwed up an important project, or he’s stressed about his finances and family issues, or he’s in the debt: no matter what the reason. The solution is to back off and give him space.
You’re Doing Something That’s Causing Him To Pull Away:
He is backing off or acting distant because of something that you’re doing. So, what is it that you’re doing most likely you are acting “too needy” that is the main reason why a guy will retreat and take space in a relationship because neediness is very unattractive? That’s why it feels like such a drain on the guy because it just feels like she always needs something from me. And he feels resentful because he can’t give you those things. Those are things that only you can give yourself, and that’s a lot of pressure to put on someone else.
Men want to feel wanted and desired, not needed. He doesn’t want to feel like your emotional well-being depends on him. And how he responds to you that’s not his role and job isn’t to make you feel good about yourself. An important thing to remember is that men move towards what feels good and away from what feels bad. If your relationship has developed this negative energy then, this resentment a tone that feels very cold or like expectations aren’t being met. He’s just kind of gonna pull himself away from the relationship because it doesn’t feel good to be around that what feels good is a happy positive warmth that starts with you. Because the woman sets the emotional tone for a relationship.
If he does something wrong, of course, you’re upset and angry at him for whatever it is. He did that hurt, and you expect him to fill you up with confidence and happiness. So that’s something you could be unknowingly doing, that’s pushing him away and causing him to act distant. If it seems like he’s getting increasingly annoyed and frustrated by you then, you cannot shut yourself down a guy’s throat.
He Is Unsure About The Relationship:
Unfortunately, sometimes it just isn’t a match, and you both see it that’s the best-case scenario because you can just part amicably, and nobody gets seriously hurt. He might be realizing that while he likes you and cares about you, he just doesn’t see the long-term potential here. And it could be that he wants a woman with a different type of personality, or he wants someone who is more in alignment with him.
When it comes to certain values, whatever it is, he just doesn’t think that this is a match. And if this is the case, there is nothing you can do about it. You can’t force someone to feel the way that you want them to feel, you can’t force love out of someone. You can inspire it by being your best self or by being happy but being confident by just living your best life. But if you are doing this, and he’s still unsure about you then, he’s just not the right guy for you because the right guy for you wants to be with you.
So if this is the situation that you’re in then, you just need to gracefully. Let him let you go because it will free you up to meet the guy that you actually are supposed to be with because he’s not unsure about you. He’s not going cold on you or feeling unsure about the relationship.
It’s pretty clear and obvious when a guy wants to be with you, don’t make the mistake of chasing after him, and don’t try to win him over. This is just a waste of time, and this will just drag things out, and it’ll just pummel your self-esteem in the process. Don’t take it personally because some people just aren’t a match for the things that this guy doesn’t like about. You are about to become such a thing that another guy loves you. So it isn’t personal, and it doesn’t mean you’re unworthy or unlovable or any of those horrible things.